INTRODOOSING!!!
BREED-SPACIFIC POOPAGE SCOOPAGE™ SYSTEMS
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POOPAGE SCOOPAGE™ Systems use the EXACT SAME technologeeze used by assedernots what may one day be crawling all over Uranus! |
Each POOPAGE SCOOPAGE™ system is scientypically designed to match the requirements of yer dawg and shit. Each of our systems include a scoopage tool, spacialy designed with yer dawg's end in mind, and a reveloosinary baggage system that opens only on one end so shit don't fall out the other end when you put shit in it! No more mess! Enjoy the freedom of sandals!
Here are just a few of our models!
The
Bag & Toss Junior® POOPAGE
SCOOPAGE™
system© is for when you have a chewowow (actually
a large rodent but can be trained to evacuate its bowels on command by
simply looking at it), and you has to pick up the single lil turdlette
they leave behind. But wait! This system is ready to grow with you! This
solid state equipment can be used to pick up multiple single lil
turdlettes! No need to upgrade just cause el Quavo manages to get his
lil rodent pecker packed into the Pinto Santa Maria bitch and knocks her
up! And! If you get fed up with being seen takin three shakey lil rats
on a leash out fer a public dump, the bag is big enough to dispose of
the entire problem!
Got one of those
weird hotdawg dawgs? Now you can eliminate that pesky foot long problem
where you has to break and fold their deposit to get it into the bag!
The Long Load® POOPAGE
SCOOPAGE™
system© can bag even the big boys! And! These custom designed
tongs, custom designed so you don't has to get dawg shit all over yer
hands, make pickin up the puppies as easy as pluckin yer sausage from
a sizzlin stew!
When you has one of those huge freekin dawgs what you see in sci-fido movies, all hung down to the top of a tractor-trailer, cloggin up yer driveway with superscentory sediments, you need The Load Master® POOPAGE SCOOPAGE™ system©! It lifts those big jobs as easily as a fork lifts them ones that regular sized dawgs like leave behind! The bagging/mulching attachment is a real timesaver! Fertileyes yer entire freekin community! And! (optional roof not included)
Oder today and stuff.